This may take 3 to 5 years.
As I get older, the carrot of money, prestige and stuff has become less orange and sweet. That’s not true- maybe it’s truer to so that I’m lazier to grab at it with my teeth. but at the age of 47 with an ample income, 59k left on the mortgage and more clogs than I ever could have use for, I need to trick myself into writing another hour of stand-up comedy to earn.
Therefore, in an effort to get myself to write (my last special OLD BABY came out on Netflix the beginning of 2017), I’m starting a blog. I love an audience and so, welcome to the quiet, terrible show.
I’m not the best comedian, I’m certainly not the smartest or hardest working, but I thought maybe it’d be helpful to share how I wrote a new hour- and if in sharing, I actually ended up writing and polishing a new hour? All the better! And if that means out of it comes a lot of writing that could be a self-published book on Amazon that could be passive income as I age? Well, don’t mind if I do!
And really, why write a new hour of stand-up comedy? I ask myself desperately? Besides for the moneY? I could do the same act for the next 20 years and make an ok living. (I’m not sure if that actually- that may be a rumor from the age of Vaudeville) . What’s the point of new stuff, existentially-
-I’m a relatively unknown (my name will not be remembered in the next century or most likely even in the next 10 years)
-I’m a white middle aged lady whose pov is the equivalent of Priv Lit. It’s time for me to step aside and hand the mic to any number of extremely talented artists whose voices aren’t being heard. I’d be more useful being volunteering as a secretary at a non-profit.
-I’m dumping onto a hoarders’ mountain of content
-I’m distracting people (including myself) from the horrifying social inequalities, the degradation of our planet and the general Room for Improvement in Everything.
So, here’s the only reason I can come up with:
It (sort of) makes me feel good. Maybe even happy. And I’ve only got one life- so, even if no one else cares, I do. And that’s probably the one person who should. And it might pay some bills.
And- sometimes not always- but enough times- I feel pleasantly “used up” after doing stand up (especially when they are new rrrrrich bits and the audience’s laughter has sculpted the rich bit itself!), that it makes it worth all of the painful procrastination, self-loathing and stage fright. And it covers a 2 week vacation to Norway.
And It feels good to try. And even to fail. (If there other comics around to commiserate a play by play of what went wrong in the 2nd half). And then, try again. And it means I can put those electric yellow patent leather clogs in the shopping cart and log into PayPal with confidence, all the better.
And that’s reason enough I guess. Why am I trying to prove it to you? This is a blog, not a grant.
I apologize for all of the terrible grammar and spelling mistakes and poor journalistic structure in advance. I apologize if I say anything totally off or unhelpful. Let your disgust at my half-assedness trampoline you into working on your own one-person donkey-driven Cavalia.
So, thanks for reading. This is my first entry to tell you about the writing of a new hour of material.
Well, I haven’t started yet so you’ll just have to sit with me here. Be patient. I’ll think or something. Or not. I guess that’s sort of the “process”.